Cancel 0 My friend and I always joke that we only date sociopaths also known as: The bright side of our misfortune is that over the years we have recognized some red flags that may help others avoid the tumultuous and ultimately impossible relationship that is dating a soce.
Anyway, I am not a mental health professional. If you genuinely think that you or someone you know is a soce you should probably go speak to someone about that ASAP. The following is a non-scientific, purely speculative guide as to whether you are dating a soce-like dude and should set that hawk free. An undercover soce-with-the-most thrives at the swooning process.
He lives for it. To him your love affair progresses almost like the plotline of a Nicholas Sparks novel. This is a flagrantly fire-truck-red coloured flag. To him the molding and manipulation of your mind is like a game of chess, as one of my exes professed: Are you also a Scientologist?
This is not an accident. Yes, he does this on purpose, in fact he enjoys it. This is to draw you closer and keep you under his weird voodoo-like spell. Of course he said that super charming thing that knocked you right off your socks. He basically sees right through you, I bet. Any intelligent man could, I imagine, watch The Notebook or read Cosmo and come up with sweet things to woo you with, but a vast percentage of the male population simply does not do this.
Why would a dude go to those great lengths when he could just not? Please stop being so crazy. The tangled webs he weaves. He lies with style, with conviction. He makes you think the absurd is the normal. Just listen to yourself right now. I am not a science project. You are reading way too deep into things, basically always.
What are you feeling right now? Oh, that is very interesting. This one is pretty obvious yet I still always get roped in. He is a professional emotional manipulator with narcissistic tendencies — that is his job description.
He rehearses how to convince people he is feeling sad, or angry, or he loves you. Obviously not all actors are sociopaths and not all sociopaths are actors, but you have to be particularly careful with actors. They are in a highly suspect class from the outset. Range of emotions or lack thereof. He just always knows how to react in a situation based on examining how people should react in those situations. Especially when he looks like he could be a GQ model.
He still had his soce-training-wheels on. One time I actually got to witness this phenomenon and I imagined him doing one of those weird deep-breathing and eyes-glazing-over transformations in the other room. Literally, a different person came back in. So American Psycho it is not okay. He tells you he loves you within a week of meeting you. He snaps on you when you catch him off-guard. It was a question.
Especially if he always has to have the last word and always has to be in control of the situation. You call him a socio. Yes, this has really happened.
Not even just once. There is just something off about him.