Having lesbian sex for first time. Intimacy Intervention: ‘I’m Having My First Same-Sex Experience!’.



Having lesbian sex for first time

Having lesbian sex for first time

Alaina Leary July 19, at Queer women may not necessarily deal with the same heteronormative stereotypes and expectations, but we still all have different feelings about our first time. We asked six queer women what their first time was like, what they loved and what they wish they could do over!

This was before I came to terms with my asexuality, and came out. I think I felt like I needed to have sex because most of my friends were. Now, I can be upfront with my girlfriends beforehand so they know where things stand.

Like anything else, you need to practice at sex—and all the communicating that goes into it—before you can improve. If your first time wasn't what you expected, try to remember what you might think about next time, whether it's being more forthright with a partner about your preferences, or trying something different during foreplay. I kind of knew I was a lesbian, but I had no idea what genderqueer meant, and I went for it anyway.

It was a physical experience and a choice—not a part of who I am. So why should this define me? But, honestly, I was still me. I identified differently, but I was still in there, and a part of me knew I was trans. You're constantly exploring your body and your identity, and who you sleep with, how they identify and how you identified at the time aren't things that have to follow you forever.

If your first time was with a guy before you realized you were gay, that's okay, and it's also okay if you had sex before you transitioned or came out as asexual. Your actions have no impact on your identity, especially if you don't want them to. You may have been worried about things like "How do queer women even have sex? You may not have known if you'd need sex toys before having sex for the first time.

Since the media tends to perpetuate myths like these, and sex education isn't always comprehensive or inclusive if you had any at all! That it would change everything about my life, even though my first time was with a girl and not a guy.

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Having lesbian sex for first time

Alaina Leary July 19, at Queer women may not necessarily deal with the same heteronormative stereotypes and expectations, but we still all have different feelings about our first time. We asked six queer women what their first time was like, what they loved and what they wish they could do over!

This was before I came to terms with my asexuality, and came out. I think I felt like I needed to have sex because most of my friends were. Now, I can be upfront with my girlfriends beforehand so they know where things stand. Like anything else, you need to practice at sex—and all the communicating that goes into it—before you can improve.

If your first time wasn't what you expected, try to remember what you might think about next time, whether it's being more forthright with a partner about your preferences, or trying something different during foreplay.

I kind of knew I was a lesbian, but I had no idea what genderqueer meant, and I went for it anyway. It was a physical experience and a choice—not a part of who I am. So why should this define me? But, honestly, I was still me. I identified differently, but I was still in there, and a part of me knew I was trans.

You're constantly exploring your body and your identity, and who you sleep with, how they identify and how you identified at the time aren't things that have to follow you forever. If your first time was with a guy before you realized you were gay, that's okay, and it's also okay if you had sex before you transitioned or came out as asexual. Your actions have no impact on your identity, especially if you don't want them to. You may have been worried about things like "How do queer women even have sex?

You may not have known if you'd need sex toys before having sex for the first time. Since the media tends to perpetuate myths like these, and sex education isn't always comprehensive or inclusive if you had any at all! That it would change everything about my life, even though my first time was with a girl and not a guy.

Having lesbian sex for first time

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5 Comments

  1. Alaina Leary July 19, at So why should this define me? I've been with lots of guys but when it comes to girl-girl sex, well, can I call myself a virgin?

  2. The most important thing for any of us on the planet is that we feel good in our skins and love ourselves unconditionally. I didn't want to be that girl - mainly because the guy wasn't my type - but it suddenly occurred to me that I could use Tinder to curate my fantasy of sleeping with a woman.

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